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I have some problems with my orgasm

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I have some problems with my orgasm, in real I have had sex with many of my boy friends and no real orgasm has been experienced. Every time I faked they and they believed me. Now I am living with my present boy friend for an year and I really liked him I want to tell him about this thing as he wants to marry me, me too likes him very much. But if he knows I am faking him he won’t forgive me as it is an important thing in our life that is so personal. What should I do?


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Category: Family Physician-GP
 23 Doctors Online

Expert:  Dr. John Monheit replied 4 Days ago

Thanks for the question. Women all over the world experience certain difficulties in the case of having an orgasm. They sometimes don’t experience a real orgasm and they fake the partner as having one. This is what is happening in your life. It does not make you a dishonest or a bad person. It is the media that tells us that women will have an orgasm each time they have a penetrative sex. This is not real as if the women are in a tensed state or any other reason she won’t get a proper orgasm.

In a recent research study, it says –a large number of women need a clitoral stimulation so as to reach orgasm. Clitoris is having the shape of a small sized pea. It is seen on the outside of vagina. It is the sensitive part of women. By stimulating this part the women reaches to the orgasm.

In some cases the failure is due to the reason that she has not yet learn how to have an orgasm. Relaxing is an important factor here. It gives the feel of arouse and also have a good contact with the partner. Women sometimes just concentrate only in reaching the orgasm; this is not a good thing. Some becomes oblivious to the surrounding and easily finds to orgasm. While some others like on focusing it as a fantasy.

Women usually take some time to learn-how to have an orgasm. The method commonly known as masturbation helps the women to have a deep knowledge on their own body and thus know how to pleasure her. By simply touching the body and feel the changes is an easy way. Then she can share with her partner.

It is up to you to decide whether to tell or not to tell it to your boy friend. Through communicating you may find an easy way to tell him why you faked. 


Dr. John Monheit
Category: Family Physician-GP
Experience: 
Residecny: North Colorado Family Medicine
Medical School: The Chicago Medical Center
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